Full me once...

I am such a fool! Such a fool! For holding, for not letting go, for believing that loving you will set me free, that showing you compassion will help me, us become new versions of us. What a fool I am! For again and again focusing on you! And forgetting about myself! How come I keep giving you the power and putting me and my healing in second place! I am so angry with myself! So angry with myself! Foe believing that you are honest when you say I'm sorry for the pain! For giving you chance over a chance over a chance! For showing you that I will love you no matter what! That you don't need to deserve my love, that my love is here for you when you need it! I am such a fool! Such a fool! And when I say you'll have to work freaking hard to be even my friend, I mean it now! You will have to work really freaking hard! I was here ready to say I'm sorry for everything I did while we were together that you found disrespectful, everything that I did that made you feel like you were not good enough, everything where I could've shown you more love! There is nothing to apologize for, nothing! The person I need to apologize, nurture and love is me, only me!